Jealousy hurts. I’ve always known it, and I’ve seen it in some children, but today was the first day I really got to see Eleanor get jealous. It’s actually really cute but sometimes annoying. She was busy playing with her Salaam Sisters dolls and plethora of other toys. Meanwhile my wife and I were sitting on the couch catching up on some Attack on Titan (don’t judge). I figured the little one was busy and wouldn’t be bothered and so I took the opportunity to rest my head down on my wife’s lap.
I’m sure if any of you have children then you know what happens next. Without even looking in our direction she dropped her Karima doll, turned around, and locked eyes with me. It was judgement time. She stood up quickly and let out a shrill. The next moment she was rushing towards me with a look in her eyes of betrayal. She ran with complete disregard to her surroundings, it didn’t matter how many toys were in her path. She was the fastest little thing you might have ever saw run in your life.
Then it happened, there was one toy in front of her that she just couldn’t avoid, and it clipped her leg as she charged towards me. It would have been nice if that was the end of it and she just fell to the ground writhing in pain, but no, she hit the wood bottom of the couch.
As you can imagine, she cried for quite a while in my arms. It was then that I realized; Who does jealousy really hurt?
The realization came at a perfect time because I was just dealing with some jealousy myself, and I really didn’t know how to handle it. That was until I saw her fall and realized that I would be next. If I didn’t figure out a way to stop focusing on what was eating at my heart, it would destroy me, I would destroy myself. Just like my daughter stopped focusing on all of the good around her that she possessed, and everything that made her feel good, for what bothered her. I too had forgotten about everything great I had and lost focus, or rather, refocused on what I didn’t need to focus on.
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