My girl: Realizing that I won’t always be there for her.

My girl. Within the last 24 hours I’ve prayed 3 funeral prayers. One of them put me on an emotional rollercoaster when an old man stepped up to the mic and took an exorbitant amount of time explaining the method of the prayer. Some people began to get annoyed, but I knew in my heart what was going on, we were about to pray over his deceased wife. It became clearer once we all could hear the sobbing in the microphone. It became worse when the prayer finished, and people came to console him. As he was overwhelmed with a sea of hugs a group came and started carrying his wife’s body away, he screeched and ran after her.

My heart stopped watching that sight. I thought about my sins, I thought about my family, my daughter. No one can understand. I’ve written short stories for her, I have a book I’m writing for her, I have journals I’ve written in since the day I became Muslim for her to read one day, I moved halfway across the world, all for my family. All so that I could give them a chance to cultivate a relationship with God away from some of the major distractions that took me away from Him.

Death is coming, and one day I’m not going to be with my little girl. I’m not going to be with my family, and only three things will go with me.

  1. An ongoing charity, this I hope manifests itself in the various projects that I invest myself in. Stay tuned to @TheBissauProject for the latest.

 

  1. Knowledge which is beneficial. This is why I am here studying. To lift the veil of knowledge from myself, my family and community.

 

  1. “Or a righteous child that prays for him” This is what I hope all of my children grow to be. That before they pray over me, I am able to give them something that causes them to realize that Baba tried more than anything to show them the awesomeness of God.

 

If I can do that, I can die happy.

But I hope that my little one now, and those that God may gift me in the future all come to learn, Baba loves you, and so does God.

 

Arthur K. Richards

 

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